Tuesday, May 16, 2017
open for fun
On Saturday, our middle daughter graduated with a Bachelor's Degree in Nursing. She put herself through school (with her husband's help) while working part-time or full-time. I'd say that is quite a feat. Although joyous, the day pulsed with sorrow-missing my husband. The conflict of emotions was palatable. How great it would have been for him to be with us. His laugh loud, I imagined his arms wrapping around our daughter, kisses marking her forehead, "I am so very proud of you. You've worked so hard," he would draw her close. How does one parent make up for the other's sudden absence? I don't think this is possible. I am me and I am not him.
I am the more practical, level-headed; I bet my kids would categorize me as boring in comparison to their father. Feeling sad and a bit inadequate without him, blinking through tears, I look up and ahead spot a whole truck solely dedicated to Ritz Crackers. Don't you think this is odd? That was my first reaction and then it reminded me how much my husband loved Ritz. He would sit and eat a sleeve of the buttery crackers at a time. The message is fun. Fun can be infused into my life. Spontaneity can still be a part of my life too. So can joy.
Then I remembered the first minutes of this day. After a few slobbery kisses across my nose and lips from my dog Rex, he rolled over for a rub and wagged his tail furiously, batting it across my face. I laughed out loud. My head resting back on the pillow, I smiled. Immediately my thought was, "I am happy. It is a new day." My husband's philosophy: Each day we are given is a gift. He taught me so much, among the lessons...infuse each day with fun-each day is indeed a gift. I certainly digested Ritz's public service announcement. Thanks Jerry.