Friday, April 21, 2017

what's a girl to do?

No wonder I know nothing about it.  When my mother was trying to explain in the middle of Grant's Department store, I slunk away.  Embarrassed that I would see a girl in my class or worse, a boy.

Within the last year, my husband helped me loop string around myself. We carefully cut the string and measured it using a yard stick.  He explained it all to me, but I still don't get it.  Maybe I still didn't care.  I had him; he understood; that was all that mattered, at the time.

"What size am I again?" I asked him as we both looked through the bras at TJ Maxx.

Honestly, I could care less about bras; for years opting for the one size fits all variety that has little charm or appeal, but does the job.

"How do you know all this?" I asked as I searched for the appropriate size as determined by my husband.  

"I dated a lot of girls before I met you," he replied.

Still this gave me little understanding of how he knew this.  Did he talk about bras over jello for dessert (his dessert specialty while we were dating)?  Certainly, this never came up in our conversations.  The truth is I will never know, since I didn't press him further.

Now, I wear bras that my husband chose for me.  Every morning I chuckle to think of the irony of it all.  He had good taste and he knew a thing about comfortable fitting bras that look pretty darn nice. They make me feel beautiful.  I wonder, now what am I going to do without him. 


Mary Ann Reilly said...

It is the small matters that seem to carry the loss so specifically. These details speak of the love you shared. Have you seen the Patti Smith interview where she talks about Death? Very moving. I am reminded of it as I read your post in that the dead are always with us. We carry them within. I think this is true.

travelinma said...

Mary Ann, Thanks for reminding me about Patti Smith. I had watched that interview some time ago, but of course before all this! It sure takes on a whole new meaning. I know that when I saw it the first time, I didn't ever imagine that something so terrible would happen to my healthy husband. The swift nature in which the Cancer consumed him was terrifying.