Free

Eight months ago, I was old and achy downing ibruprophen like M and M's. Ascending the five steps leading into my house hurt my knees, my hips and left me breathless. Most days, I sat with my legs elevated to alleviate swelling. At the time, I did not realize that little by little I was killing myself. 

Tonight on the eve of my birthday, I know that taking a leap of faith all those months ago saved me. I spent the summer reacquainting myself with myself. Making the commitment to record what I ate, eat reasonable portions of non-processed foods and to walk daily brought me on a journey lasting 241 days so far and prompted me to redefine myself as over 55 pounds lighter and healthier. 

Committed to life-long health, I have researched the science behind weight loss. Since we do not have WiFi at home my husband and I parked my car in my daughter's driveway (within range of the WiFi) and watched a webinar on the subject of willpower, hunger and cravings. The windows of the car fogged up as I took notes for well over an hour. Susan Peirce Thompson, an expert on the brain and eating proposes no sugar and no flour because of their addictive refined qualities. In short, ingesting these poisons impact the brain's ability to detect evidence of the hormone leptin. Leptin says "I'm no longer hungry and I want to be active." Curiously this hormone is produced in the fat cells. Her recommendations are backed up by science and are hard to ignore. I may look fit. I may be thinner. However, food occupies much of my brain. My husband claims I am obsessed. I want to be free.